Still struggling to understand why I subjected myself to two hours long torture of being convincingly told that I was not loved. It was unnecessary and stupid, and added nothing to the sum of knowledge the enlightened humanity has on the matter. The funny thing is that I seemed literally to ask for it. Couldn't stop it. Something in me was nodding and saying : ay, there is nothing, just drop it all. Go back to your hole.
I suppose the dear self again... Come, Lord Emmanuel, it is becoming urgent!
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