Adoro te devote, latens Deitas

Next to the Blessed Sacrament itself, 

your neighbour is the holiest object presented to your senses.

C.S. Lewis, The Weight of Glory

Let me say it in calm, poised, less violent words. Two things stand out for me distinctly against the darkness of the Good Friday this year.

The Body of Christ : a living reality, a vital organic unity we all participate in. The balance, the homeostasis of this unity is maintained by all its members. So closely knit we are, so essential we all are to the life of the whole, so vital is the exchange of love between us, that when one of us goes, when one tiny member of this Body is taken out -- the whole Body is shattered, the whole Body is crippled and wounded, and Christ Himself is trembling in pain. 

Each and every individual death is a wound to the Body, and an offense to its members. When it befalls those we know and love, we take on the shock, absorb the wave, grieve, and bear the scar; we stand in the frontline, we are the adjacent cells suffering from a brutal removal of the flesh that, we feel, is our own flesh. And so we must, for we are in Christ -- we are allowed to bear a little. But it is no different when death takes people we do not know; their own adjacent cells then absorb the shock, so that the wave of pain doesn't reach us. The wound is nevertheless inflicted to you and me, members of Christ's Body. This happens everywhere, every moment - here and now; we are just spared the feeling of loss, for we cannot bear it all. 

All days are Good Friday. There is no such thing as death or grief that are none of my business. 

Another thought comes from Gethsemany and feet-washing. God's love has no other way to reach the world than through you and me. Through us and in us He loves, and His own very life we carry when we let it happen in our hearts and minds. No Kingdom is possible unless there are people who desire the Kingdom and let it be brought down here -- now and then, little by little, one piece after another, smuggling it in whenever possible. No matter how weak and inadequate, no matter how totally irrelevant we might feel  -- we must forget it all for a while, and let God give, care, help, serve through us;  and sometimes, us!  We have to, simply because there is nobody else to do the job: He has only our hearts and minds, our voices and our hands to make overflow the fountain of His life. 

God's love is running in Christ's blood, like grief is running in mine, and the transfusion is slowly taking place. To be fully human means holding in our hearts both the tragedy of life and the fountain of love; allowing both the sore grief for what is irreversibly lost, and an overflowing gratitude for what is so generously given. 

Unconditional Love

It's not even what exactly he says, it's the way he says it: the experience we are only blindly looking for is there, don't you sense?

And Rumi's line came in today too : "Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it".

The Dynamics of Falling Upwards III: The Sleeping Giant

Confidently detached, delightfully connected

What happens in meditation is slow, humble, routine, and may go unnoticed for months, if not for years. However, something strikingly momentous is happening there. By simple sitting still and consistently letting go of the normal flow of your thoughts you gain access to what C.G. Jung (and others) called “Self” - your real self; your soul. 

It feels first like coming across a sunlit clearing in a forest, or a cool well; just a surprisingly still space within. As you dwell there, you discover that it is possible to be aware of your thoughts and emotions, yet remain undisturbed, free from compulsion to follow their twittering noise. You cease to identify with feelings, emotions and thoughts, with impulses, defence mechanisms and motives that normally drive your behaviour. You acquire experimental knowledge of the fact that you are NOT these things, and that you can choose whether to act in accordance with their appeal or not. Much of what seemed absolutely inescapable - destiny, curse, fate - appears now as a mere option. This is what confidently detached means: freedom to perceive a choice.

Then you become aware of the connection; you realise that your simple "dwelling within" IS connection whereby you are included, rooted, embraced, held within an incessant stream of reality. A radically new relationship with the world is emerging: you no longer receive your legitimacy and validation from your environment, but from this "being within"; from God. This is like a quiet ocean of light within, a light that has almost material density; a solid ground of peace under your feet. This is the delightful connection that chases away fear and makes you capable of fellowship with everything that exists, enables you to welcome with kindness, accueillir avec douceur. This all-inclusive acceptance will now validate and communicate legitimacy to your environment.  

Yep. Say hello to your immortal soul. The sleeping giant is rising. Be sure, he is on his way to shatter your world. 

From Fire by Fire

Time to elaborate on the cheerful bit. One thing we can be sure of (but seldom are): what is broken and torn apart has to be broken and torn apart. God doesn’t cut off our lives anything but garbage, dead leaves, dysfunctional limbs. Anything that can not stand the light of His reality is not worthy of our attention, let alone our attachment. Good riddance! Go ahead, Lord, and make us a good bonfire with this stuff. Nothing of real value will be burnt, no real connection will ever be lost, however painful and scary it might feel; just the old dirty clothes, which anyway are not our size anymore.